To me - these movies are like the warm blanket you put over yourself on a cold rainy day... Like a cup of hot chocolate after playing out in the snow... Like a big hug from strong arms when you're feeling weak.
THAT is the problem.
These movies are the exact opposite of a warm blanket or a cup of hot chocolate or a big hug. They are the un-warm blanket, un-hot chocolate and unhug..
And yet - women like me - all over the world are hook line and sinker for these kinds of movies. WOMEN.. intelligent, attractive, articulate, beautiful, well read (not that I am any of these things - but I'm trying to emphasize generally - not-easy-to-sucker women) fall for this..
What happens to us when the movie starts, and the lights are down low, and the leading man comes on - so vulnerable - so willing to love - so HOT (usually - very gorgeous...)...
But its the idea.. The idea that the man in that movie can be real... That you can go to the bar that you frequent, and the next guy that leans his gyrating (sp?!) buttocks against you is potentially the sexy, sweet, brooding, dark, manly, the perfect combination of rock hard muscle and tender sweetness and vulnerability man you've been waiting your whole life for - and that watching a bajillion romantic chick flick movies has entitled you to...
Hogwash..
Let us examine, with good girlfriend glasses - 10 romantic chick flicks, and how many of those men - really - after the movie is over - are men who we'd advise our girlfriends to stick with..
- Dirty Dancing - But really (key phrase in my life I can't live without)?! The guy works at a vacation spot in the Northeast somewhere teaching dance lessons!?
- Titanic - The guy didn't have a solid job - and didn't have the potential of a solid job, gambled and barely any education.
- Pretty Woman - A bajillionaire who went to find a hooker when times were hard... and then - told all her deepest and darkest secrets to his friends when pushed.. Talk about push-over.
- Nottinghill - Was he a book keeper? I don't even remember - that is how memorable he was...
- Grease - Wasn't the guy a gangsta thug?
- Legends of the Fall - A nomadic brother who couldn't sit still - didn't have a job - and was a womanizer.
- How to lose a guy in 10 days - He only got together with her for a story to forward his career.. It just was his luck that he fell in love with her. But when things aren't so hot and heavy - is he going to choose his career again?
- Just like Heaven - Didn't his wife JUST die?
- Sleepless in Seattle - He's an unfit dad who was so involved with his own life that he barely kept up with his son's needs and wants. What if he has a kid with you?
- Working Girl - Wasn't he technically cheating on his girlfriend when he met Melanie Griffith?
Okay - these may not be THE top 10 romantic chick flicks in the entire world - but they drill in a very important point. What happens to us in a movie theater where all good girlfriend suggestions fly out the door and we end up going, "Sigh - I wish I was with a man like him." Because, the reality is - if a guy like him REALLY walked into the door - we'd poo poo him immediately, and then bemoan the fact that we didn't have men from such romantic chick flick movies in our lives...
But - the tragedy - and my ultimate point (finally) in this blog is - it also prevents us women from meeting wonderful men with flaws, or appreciating the wonderful men in our lives, with flaws.. We all have flaws, just like the men in the movies, but men, with their flaws, can be just as amazing as the men in those chick flick movies, without the trumped up music and or zoom in camera angle... as long as WE become those things for them... (meaning, view them in that light with that certain sense of "wee").
Hopefully, these romantic chick flick movies don't ruin us and make us expect more than even what the movie itself is representing.
And as a dear friend, we'll call her Cheeza, says, "Really, you're going to base your entire life's outlook on a movie? THAT'S a good plan."
She's a smart ass sometimes, but I love her, and boy - does she have a point.
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