Appreciation Nation

Nothing can get a good cry outta me like appreciation. I'm a woman - and yeah - Chinese or not - nothing hits a woman in the chest like downright-unadulterated-sincere-appreciation. It can stop a Catholic nun (like those depicted by Meryl Streep in "Doubt") dead in her tracks. It can bring a cold-hearted biatch to her knees. It can probably stop a speeding bullet if the bullet came from a gun held by a woman who was pulling the trigger-who was just appreciated.

Appreciation.

Okay -so - I was appreciated today. Usually - the best appreciative emotion comes from someone you need it from, but usually do not get it from. Constant appreciation from someone usually minimizes the effect it has on the recipient... (Sad to say- so if you're Mr. Nice guy who always is appreciative - the question then becomes - are you for real? Are you ALWAYS this appreciative of me?) So - unfortunately - it rides a fine line. Being appreciative, and OVERLY appreciative... No one can tell you where that line is - its like the Bermuda Triangle or the G-spot. No one knows its exact location... but - it's there man. It's totally there. Once crossed, you have now entered the world of no return. Well - perhaps you can return by withholding appreciation - but - its a long shot.

But - I digress. Lets get back to the nuts and bolts of it. Appreciation.

I am an Asian-giver. Not to be mistaken for an Indian-giver (please don't be offended...although - sometimes I am that too.) That's what I am. I am fiercely independent, but at the end of the day - I like to please other people by giving. Giving of myself - and giving of my time and effort. It is exhausting, I'll tell you what - and I will be sure to raise my children in a more selfish way. However, that is how I do. It is worse in triplicate because Asian woman do not know how to accept a compliment, a word of appreciation, or anything that is nice as a result of their efforts. It is a phenomenon known as, "Are you freaking kidding me?" - because there is no such name to this phenomenon. Not sure if some white guy has labeled it. There sure as heck isn't one in chinese that I know of - because it is of such commonality - its like saying that there is a label for saying 'good morning' to someone in the morning. There is nothing that "explains" what it is - it just is, and everyone knows it - and that is that..

As such - the tendency to accept the appreciation is usually pushed away. I am learning, however, to accept these moments of appreciation. Believe it or not - its uncomfortable. Accepting appreciation should be a happy thing. Usually - I accept it like I accept someone's words of kindness after they just caught me tripping and falling headfirst down a flight of stairs, and has just come over to ask me if I'm alright. "Yeah -um - thanks." is usually the response to both appreciation and sympathy.

But - tonight - I was offered appreciation - and I accepted it. And WHAT'S WORSE - I told the appreciator how much I appreciated their appreciation. I'm in uncharted territory people!!!

So - despite what Sprout, who I have been requested to rename "Luscious" - wants, go forth blog people - and appreciate or accept appreciation from people!! It will leave you in a warm afterglow- and you will be glowing for a while.

But not glowing cause you're preggers... and don't tell people you're glowing - because - they'll think you're preggers.. just -FEEL the glow. BE the glow.